Thursday, September 29, 2005.

Tomorrow last paper!!!!! UWOS.... After that holiday le!

{ 2:39:00 PM }

Wednesday, September 28, 2005.

Just finish my maths paper this morning... haiz.. lost 20 marks... 2 questions with each 10 marks... i completely didn't do... then there are still other questions that i may do wrong... Can i get A? overall i still can do... haiz...

{ 1:59:00 PM }

Tuesday, September 27, 2005.

My mum just came back yesterday from her holiday at thailand.. She brought quite alot of things for me n my brother... usually, she always will buy foot wears for me... i got so many new slippers and sandals or wat still haven't wear... She bought 3 pairs for me... like the previous time she went malaysia... She also bought 3 pairs of slippers.. Till now, still left 1 pair i haven't wear de... hahaz... Then, She also bought 3 pairs of 3/4 pants for me and a handbag... I felt quite blessed... even though the things she bought for me doesn't really caught my eyes and not really the things that i wanted to have recently... hahaz.. but still thanks.. hehez.. =D

Haiz.. Many of my school mates are already enjoying their holiday already... me, still got another 2 more papers on wednesday and friday... maths and UWOS...hahaz.. nevermind lahz... love maths!! UWOS also ok lahz.. I still haven't touch my maths from last week... but shouldn't be forgotten the things i studied last week... Yeah.. =P

I am still thinking.. how to invite my friends and classmates to church... I need to take the step of faith!!! Why am i so afraid to ask my classmates??? haiz... but i want to step out... The coming month, there will be a lot of outreach events... like our church members in SP going to have a evangelistic outreach... and my service is going for a "friend connection" .. It should be called like this if i am not wrong...yah lohz.. but i can't only wait till there's special event then i invite my friends... I just desire to see revival in my class! Faith!!!

{ 1:47:00 PM }

Thursday, September 22, 2005.

On tuesday was my first paper MOB... haiz... Paper was not that difficult except the last article.. However, i can't do many of the questions in the front too... Perhaps i wasn't really prepared for that paper... because the day before was rushing to study everything... the things that i had studied didn't go into my mind... But i hope that overall result, i can pass.... i don't want to retake that module again..

After my exam on that day, i went back to my secondary school to take my o'level cert and went to church cafe to study... i was doing my maths... not that worry.. yeah.. Not long, phileo came to study also... jeremiah came at 5 plus or 6 plus.. i not sure.. then my cg members came too.. of course not there to study.. hahaz... why so many people? It was because there was a service 5 & 6 prayer meeting in the later evening... Yup..

The prayer meeting was really awesome.. The presence of God was so strong... The 2 word, "i must!!!" make me know that i must continue to reach out to my friends... Just want to believe in God...

Then today.. Basically, my mum went on holiday.. then my dad will be outside most of the time... so at home only left me and my brother... We shared the houseworks... Yeah.. Then in the evening, i went back to sch for my java paper... It was a 6pm paper... The paper overall was quite tough... especially the last few questions... i really can't understand what the question wants... and i don't even bother to flip my textbook le... because when i refer to my textbook, it's when i know what should i write but i can't remember the code... yeah... However, i still like java programming alot.. just like how i like maths.. hahaz...

Yep.. i think i will stop writing le... Gd night.. bye... =P

{ 11:33:00 PM }

Saturday, September 17, 2005.

This few days, i have been enjoying His presence during my QT with Him.... Yeah.. i know i draw closer to Him now.. Indeed as i draw close to Him, He will draw closer to me... He will only come to you when you are really seeking Him... Agree? yup yup.. I know i wants to move up to another level in my spiritual life and do greater things for God.. but i know there's a season... it will come... i am impatient but i will trust in Him.... seek Him... cuz seek first the Kingdom of God and all His righteousness, and all other things will be added to you... yup.. (Ps. hahaz.. i just type what i can remember for that verse.. there maybe mistake...) Yah lor.. So really thank God.... = D

{ 2:01:00 AM }

Thursday, September 15, 2005.

I decided to go church to study today... I just love the house of God... I was mugging on my MOB(Management & organisational behaviours) ... It's driving me crazy... hahaz... It's because there are so many chapters to memorise.. that makes it so tough to study... more than 10 chapters to remember... I think it's more tougher than studying my social studies during my o level days... At least for social studies, we were been prepared months ago before our o level... and is only few chapters that we can choose to study... but for MOB, haiz... within this 5 days, i have to memorise everything... Today when i start studying my first chapter, i was like....... hope that i can no need to study this module... hahaz... but no choice... God help me!!! Seriously, i hate memorising... = (

Also, i was supposed to meet meiping in church to study together... haiz... but she didn't turn up in the end... i wanted to pray with her de... and spent more time with her.. I really want to press into her life... not just normal communication and chat that we can only have... but it's more than that... i closer friendship with her...

As i look upon carolyn, my discipler, there's so much that i want to learnt from her... The faith and anointing she have in doing things... How much can i come and teach my members who are spiritually younger.. As my brother once told me, i can make disciples now.. It really hit me... I ought to be teaching people right now... Right now, i just want to take that step of faith to do more things... Also, my one weakness is to counsel people for their problems and talking to people who are not open to speak... haiz... God, i seek You.. and continue to seek and ask... I ask for Your wisdom and anointing, and rise my faith up...

{ 9:25:00 PM }

Wednesday, September 14, 2005.

Praise God!!! The UWOS test just now aren't that difficult... sill can do... Also, i studied for that 4 chapters for about 4 to 5 times... So if i still can't do the paper, then ...... hahaz... Anyway, praise God... The Holy Spirit guided me through the paper... ^_^

{ 7:37:00 PM }

Haiz.. After waiting for so long for this choir ministry audition, i thought today can be there... However yesterday, sandy sms me that the choir audition on today is off... i just can't believe it... hahaz... I pray, oh God, that i can go into choir ministry... I hope that the audition will come very soon!!!

Hmmm.. got UWOS test later... now having ITOS lesson... =Þ

{ 1:51:00 PM }

I began to realise that in the past how i start to drift away from God's presence, is when i am so tired at the end of the day after doin all my things and i just being so tired to spent my quiet time... I didn't put aside the things i was doing to spend my time with Him but i always came after i finished everything... Almost everyday, i was like that and began to feel somehow reluctant to spent my quiet time with Him... Like this, His presence start to drift away from me...

This week, i wanted to come back to God in the heart of worship... In the night, before i start to feel sleepy, i put aside the things that i was doing and began to spent time with Him... I started worship Him with songs... I sang and worship Him... put aside all other distractions and just wanting to be in His presence... I asked for His anointing to saturate my room... let my room to be the Holy of Holies... I knew i am drawing more closer to Him... No matter what, i want to be like that everyday.. so desire to come into His presence... I didn't want to lose Him... without Him, i feel so lost... I went through this lost feeling and i don't want to go through it again... I just want to seek Him all of my days...

Lord Jesus, i ask that everyday Your presence will saturate my soul.. take me deeper to Your love... and have a more closer relationship with You.. cause me to be even more hungry for Your presence everyday... fill my thirsts and hungriness... out of my heart will flows rivers of living water... It's You i long for.. never want to be apart from You again... I thank You and give You all of the praises... never forget of Your greatness... = ]

{ 1:24:00 PM }

Monday, September 12, 2005.

-Heart Of Worship-

When the music fades
All is stripped away
And i simply come
Longing just to bring
Something that's of worth
That will bless Your heart

I'll bring You more than a song
For a song in itself
Is not what You have required
You search much deeper within
Through the way things appear
You're looking into my heart

I'm coming back to the heart of worship
And it's all about You
It's all about You Jesus
I'm sorry Lord for the thing i've made it
When it's all about You
It's all about You Jesus

King of endless worth
No one could express
How much You deserve
And through all these years
All i have is Yours
Every single breath

{ 3:47:00 PM }

Saturday, September 10, 2005.

So tired..... so lost.....

God... I really need You.. I seek You and really want to find You... I know you understand what am i thinking and going through.. but i don't know.. so confuse... I just want to hide under Your wings.. Lord, You are my refuge... I just want to hide and seek Your face, worship.. until i find myself in Your presence once again... I am so tired that one moment i receive your touch, while another moment, i feel that You are so away from me... I need you so much more... I don't want to be apart from you... come and fill me with your strength... take away all my burdens and wearies... I can't take it anymore... I want hide in Your arms.. Lord, It's You i desire... all i need is You... just need that touch from You to will change my whole life... No matter what, I love you.. I praise Your name... You are a good God... You are worthy of all praises... thank You...

{ 11:09:00 PM }

Thursday, September 08, 2005.

This week has been a tiring week for me... hahaz... need to think for my projects... All my projects due this week... yah lor... this week is my last week for 1st semester in sch before exam break and exam... hmmm..

However, after the service on sunday, God really refresh me with His presence... He took away the tireness in me... I just fall in love with Him even more... love the Holy Spirit... =P

Yeah.. I am not satisfy with my walk with Him.. wanna draw more closer to Him... I want to rely on His strength... I want to rise up to do greater things... go up to another level in my spiritually life...

hmmm.. i have nothing much to say... I will stop here.... = ]

{ 2:09:00 PM }