Sunday, October 22, 2006.

This morning went to Vivo City to volunteer for community work with sam, kah keong, joey, gary... A community association set up some stalls at the top level of vivo city and selling some stuffs. The money receive will go to charity.. or something like that lahs.. not so sure. haha.. Bro mj ask us to volunteer ourselves so we went lohs, they need people mahs... So we just like hang out there, sat down, chat... When there is customer come to our stalls, then we will promote the items our stalls are selling... Actually, i didn't really do anything there. I went to eat at the food court there at the top level, called "food republic". There promotes singapore local food. I ate the lasi lemak. It was quite nice and i believe the food there is will be nice, but is a little bit too expensive. We stayed there until 3.30pm, then we went to marina square and ate mac. lols... After that, i went for my work at 5pm. Yeah...

Today i woke up early in the morning... tired now... -_-" hehes...

{ 11:44:00 PM }

Thursday, October 19, 2006.

Meeting Him...

Today i was supposed to work after my school. Yesterday, he asked me if i am free today to meet up for dinner so i pushed away my work. Actually he told me he didn't go for his class to meet me. hahas.. so touched eh? So today i finish school at 5pm and i was meeting him 7pm at jurong east la. 2 Hours! I went home first and had a bath and then come out. So finally got to meet him after so long never see each other. I think we got 1 month never meet out le, when in between we just only met so for me to pass him some things and i left immediately after that. Today, I gave him a watch for his birthday which his birthday was 2 weeks ago le. We went to IMM's Ajisen and had our dinner, chatted, and walk walk around for a while. Then we headed home le lohs. I took the shuttle bus from IMM to boon lay and he took the shuttle bus to je and then change to train i think. Yeah. Thank God that i can still joke and chat so normally with him. I thought i wouldn't know what to say if i going to see him. haha. Yeah..

For this 1 month and 11 days, it gave me so much memories with him that i will never forget maybe for the rest of my life. Even though we had already broke up, i will never forget him and he's still someone important to me that i treasure the relationship with him now and in the future, because he's still my FRIEND!! I will not forget what we had together in the past, now and in the future as all these are purely sweet memories and we are still good friends now.

What i am still holding on is this person and the memories we had, not the relationship we had before. Nothing wrong... I know not totally i had let go, but yet i know so clearly that i will not choose to go back to the relationship or wait for him because it has already ended, there's no point looking and going back. We will remain as friends... A real close friend that can share everything... Yeah! ^.^V

{ 11:20:00 PM }

Saturday, October 14, 2006.

Somehow, somewhat and somewhere, i just want to stop talking about you...... I am moving forward and wanting to let everything be just sweet memories and memories only... I will smile when i think of it... This is my 1st love... = )

{ 1:29:00 AM }

Friday, October 13, 2006.

Today was my 3 rd day of work le. I felt that today was good, better than yesterday. Perhaps because of the colleagues worked today ba. It was more busier today than yesterday, more customers. Finally today at least can taste billy bombers food! Not that i have not eaten at there before, actually i had eaten once at billy bombers at jp de. but today i think got the left over fries, cheese fries, chicken wings, ice cream... So i got to be able to eat those foods after we done everything for the close up for the restaurant. Today i reached home at around 12am... -_-" hmmm.. tired le...

{ 1:23:00 AM }

Monday, October 09, 2006.

1st day of work...

Today after my school ends, i went home and take my uniform and then went to work... Today was my 1st day of work at Billy Bombers. This is my 1st time working so initially i was quite worry and afraid. From yesterday night to this morning, i was still thinking if i really want to go work or not. But thank God i still choose to work in the end, and felt that it is a new challenge for me. This morning as i was wondering if i should go work or not, i sense that God's assurance, told me not to be afraid.. Whatever that he has given me to do, He knows that i will be able to do it, and He will be there for me... hehe.. Thank God.

I want to earn more money myself so that i can give more to God and for the upcoming buiding fund. God gave me an amount to give for the buiding fund, which will be twice what i gave last year. Moreover, i also want to be more financially independant, whatever that i spend on shopping or what, i didn't really want to keep using the money that my grandma gave me. I have a lot of things i want to buy too! So before the buiding fund period, i want to get what i want to get 1st! lols...

I believe that during this period of Arise & Build, i sense a breakthrough that God will be giving me in my life, esp my walk with Him. It hasn't been good in my walk with God for quite a lot of months. quite distracted... Also, in less than 1 month it will be 3 years since i got saved. So even more i believe there will be a breakthrough soon!!

Basically, today i learn how to greet the customers, serve the customers, clearing dishes, settings of table.. etc... It was quite fun and thank God the people there are quite nice. I want to be able to learn fast and i pray that favor of my colleages and boss will be upon me, and also God's guidance. Yeah! >_<

{ 11:58:00 PM }

Sunday, October 08, 2006.

When can we go out again? I wanted to ask but i didn't... I felt no courage to do so already...

{ 7:18:00 PM }

Today i was very excited to start my work for the 1st day... When i reached there at 11.55am, the boss wasn't there... The assistant boss told me because of some misunderstanding, i can't start work today... The boss forgotten to prepare the uniform for me... So he passed to me a set of uniform which i think was being wear before, so he said that he thinks that it's not so nice to ask me to wear it to work today as the shirt is quite crumpled. So he asked me to take back home to wash it and start work tomorrow. -_-"

Then i walked around marina square but i didn't really have the shopping mood. So i didn't really want to shop and i didn't have anything to buy. I wanted to ask people out but cannot find, and i decided to go home. So i went back to boon lay, went JP and pay my hp bill, then i went home... so sian 1/2......

{ 6:26:00 PM }

Friday, October 06, 2006.

Today I went back to school library to do song sheet for cgm as my printer no ink and is not working too. I reach school at almost 4 lahs. Then when i went to book the com, it gave me a com that the mouse cannot be use. I tried to cancel the booking and book again hoping to get another com, but it kept giving me the same com. faulty one... drag my time... Then i no choice went to the com that doesn't require booking but it only give us about 10 min to use it and it will log me out... I didn't know at first. So while i was doing and was going to finish, the com shut down! -_-" I was like... dotx... That time was about 4.30pm already.. and i was suppose to meet my members at that time at boon lay. So i tried to go to another com and do over again... so "gan chiong" and faster do and print it. By the time i left school, it's already 5pm. I faster went to jp and photocopy the song sheet, then i took cab down to desmond house. I was late by 15 minutes lohs...

After cgm, few of us went to jurong east. I met him at je control station to pass him his things. Just when i reach, sam called... Then i don't know why i so quickly rushed down to meet my members when i do not need to be so rushed. I didn't even talk to him anything and just passed him things and walked away. Actually after that i did hope i did stayed a little longer and perhaps could talk a little more. Arghh... After 3 weeks, i saw him again. But it seemed so wierd when i met him...... haizz..

Then we (me, john, sam, kah keong & joey) went to food court.. ate our dinner and went up to play pool. We played until around 10.30 like that and then went home le lohs... haha..

{ 11:58:00 PM }

letting go...

I think it's really painful to tell myself to let go. But it will be more painful if i don't let it go. yeah.. I am trying very hard to even though i know tears will still fell as time goes by. I just hope we will be close friends still.

You are already so busy with your work. Soon, i will be filled up with school, work and church. It even more harder for us to meet up le ba... But if u ever need someone, i will be there for you! yeah... = )

{ 12:24:00 AM }

Thursday, October 05, 2006.

I am trying to tell myself stop thinking about you... can i just stop sms-ing you? I find myself keep bothering you... You said that let's be close friends instead... go beach together, go watch movie... and share each other happiness and problems etc... How true is that? 1 week ago, perhaps i can tell myself that we just need time not to meet each other for a while... But now, as i think about it.. i find that how possible can we be good friends again? How possible can we be close friends that share alot of things and go out together? When then? 1 month, 2 month, 1 yr, 2 yr or ...? What are we now? Close friend? Perhaps don't think so ba... Every words that you used to tell me, what do you still remember right now? I don't know...

{ 12:30:00 AM }

Wednesday, October 04, 2006.

Today i never go school for the whole day. pon school... hahas.. too tired le... don't feel like going... somemore is wednesday lohs... But i still have to go to school for prayer meeting with sp chc members... We met at food court 1 at 3.20pm... that's like so far lor... 1 yr plus in school already, i think so far i only went to fc 1 twice plus today... lols.. It's at another end from my school, SB.. While i was on my way to there i was afraid i will get lost... haha.. So when i reach there, we still have to wait for somemore people to come... Prayer meeting started at around 4pm... and it ended at around 5.20... So after that rushed down to suntec to meet meiyin, jia hui, sam and xue ni... to celebrate xue ni belated birthday... As i was supposed to meet them at 5.30... I went to find them at Galare at suntec. Xue ni was opening up her presents. Sam and i shared and gave her a creative mp3 player. Meiyin, jiahui, zhiyan and andrew gave her a bag. That bag was interesting.. lols.. a sling bag and every part of the bag was personalised.. meaning the parts was chose separately and being put together as 1 bag.

So after that we went to kbox at suntec.. started singing at around 6.. We made jia hui sing and he was like so reluctant at first and so pai sei... but after that he's more ok... but actually he sang quite well lahs... hehe. At 8pm i left kbox and rush to church office for bs.. It end at around 8.45 and i went back to kbox to find them.. continue to sing. Andrew came to joined us after his bs. We sing until 10.30 like that.. Then meiyin, me and andrew went off by cab.. When we left, jia hui, sam and xue ni went esplande... I heard they was there until 1.30am... lols... so late but i hope i was there lohs... I felt that i am so addicted in going kbox... now is like each week i will be there once lor... haha.. = )

{ 11:17:00 PM }

一下下

最后一班悬浮火车
满载悬在空气中的不舍
我们却像陌路旅客
在月台分开站着毫无牵扯

现在的我能说甚么
徘徊你们之间的流浪者
说决定心是给你的
却要你给我留下来的许可

我只想再哭一下下
把记忆彻底地分化
等哭完我就会回家
眼泪我会替自己擦
我只想再哭(默哀)一下下
假如你不反对的话
以后我不会再牵挂
可知我有多努力啊
只有这办法才不再想他

希望你是谅解我的
感动过的痕迹很难割舍
一颗心就要爱你了
暂停一下并不算出尔反尔

我只想再哭一下下
把记忆彻底地分化
等哭完我就会回家
眼泪我会替自己擦
我只想再哭(默哀)一下下
假如你不反对的话
以后我不会再牵挂
可知我有多努力啊

我只想再哭一下下
把记忆彻底地分化
等哭完我就会回家
眼泪我会替自己擦
我只想再哭(默哀)一下下
假如你不反对的话
以后我不会再牵挂
可知我有多努力啊
只有这办法才不再想他

{ 12:36:00 AM }

Monday, October 02, 2006.

Heal me...

I still feel sad when i think of all these things that had happened.. I still feel like crying when you and all the memories came into my mind... I have not seen you for more than 2 weeks already... I don't want to think so much.. i want to move on... I know that we can never go back like before... We can only be close friends... as you say let's be close friends... how close u think can we get then......

God, please heal me... I need You.. give me strength to move on and serve you once again... take away my tears... and i want to be happy because i have You, Lord...

{ 6:52:00 PM }