Friday, July 31, 2009.

GOING CRAZYYYYY!
TIRED TIRED TIRED!!!
AHHHHHHH~

{ 1:25:00 AM }

Wednesday, July 29, 2009.

Because of You

Because of You, I was born again
Because of You, I'm ransomed by Your grace
Because of You, my heart has found a home
A refuge for my soul

Because of You, sins are washed away
Because of You, heaven knows my name
Because of You, I can live again
You've broken every chain

Unfailing love, so unreserved
You gave Yourself on Calvary
And now I stand, forever free
My Savior rescued me

Because of You, the weak say "I am strong"
Because of You, the broken have a song
Because of You, there's no need to fear
Hope steadfast, ever sure

Now heaven, be open
Our God is unshaken
We worship, Christ risen
High above

Now heaven, be open
All kingdoms, all nations
Declare that "You're God"

{ 10:29:00 PM }

as far as i think that i am still hanging and holding on...
am i really holding on?

{ 12:40:00 AM }

Monday, July 27, 2009.

went to ION orchard with suee, rubez, hankiong and dequan today!!!
I REALLY LOVE ION TO THE MAX!!!!!
maybe because it's so big, there're so much things there, and so much stuffs i want to buy from there!!!!
Great spending the night with them too!
Dq and hk is sooooo funnnyyyyyy la!!!

lovessssss!
:DDDDDDDDDD

{ 1:54:00 AM }

ouch!
i really hate the feeling.
it hasn't happen to me as long as i know.
but now the feeling seems to appear too many times until i really don't know what should i do.

conversations stop and topic change when you walk nearer to them.
friend turns to another person when he/she has problem, and hardly turn to you now.
when everyone knows what's going on, except you.
.
.
.


am i just thinking too much?
am i too sensitive?

nowadays, this feeling is creeping up to me too often.
hate it!

{ 1:07:00 AM }

Friday, July 24, 2009.

This few days have been crazy! High fever for days.... Monday, the highest was 39.3.. Tuesday, my temperature hit 39.9. Wednesday, it dropped to around 38.4. Today, no fever, my voice is back but coughing like crazy.... OMG!!!! first time after so many years.....

I really wanted to go choir prac on tuesday and thought that i could make it through... but i guess i reached church too early, waited for the choir peeps for dinner for too long, until i really can't take it... so half and hour before meeting them for dinner, i decided to go home and rest. Missed choir prac! can't be involved in the performance choir.... :(((( SAD-DED!!!

Anyway, MC-ed from work for 4 days. I feel so awkward to go back tomorrow la...
zzzzzzzzz

{ 1:14:00 AM }

Monday, July 20, 2009.

This morning i woke up sick...
zzzz...
In the afternoon the fever came at 39 degree celsius...
I was so restless, whole body was aching like crazy!
Throat was terrible.
Head was even terrible when i cough.

My mum even cooked curry and fried fishes for dinner... LOL!!

when was the last time i had a fever like this...
I guess it was in primary school la!

I managed to go into quiet time just now. Tried very hard to press in and focus.

Prayer and panadols just now really did wonders for my fever!
From 39 degree celsius just now, now has dropped to 37.7 degree celsius!!!
1 degree celsius down really makes a lot of difference la!!!!
My body and head feels more normal now.

Wanna go back to work on wed!!!!
MC=loses money...
zzzzzz

:DDDDDD

{ 11:35:00 PM }

Had a great time spending the whole day with my friends!
We had been eating and eating non stop...
Lunch, ice cream, dinner, ice cream, home cooked dinner.
Celebrated thomas's birthday...
OMG~

I'm just tired. physically tired. seriously tired.
I think there's a funny feeling in my throat now.
I don't want to get sick la!!!!! :(

I feel that i have neglecting the more important part in a friendship.
I want a true friend, not just an aquaintance.
Someone who is open to share anything with each other.
Be a better friend...
Hopes to care more, but i need strength...
not looking just at myself, but others.

{ 12:39:00 AM }

Wednesday, July 15, 2009.

Work has been pleasant so far! Great environment, friends and pay... what more can i ask? I guess this is the best place of all that i had worked before.

However, i really struggle a lot in working life. The struggle of hitting my sounding alarm and not returning to my sleep. Too often i feel like excusing myself for the day and catch up with my losing rest. When i get into a new environment, my I-ness gets to the lowest point. Too much thoughts processing in my mind before i decide to speak, and eventually i ended up speechless for most of the time. Engaging people. Fear of not being able to be learn fast enough. These are my weaknesses. Too much fear... I really need to overcome it!

Touched the ceiling... After so long, it seems like it's just cracking a little by little. I don't want just a crack! I want to break it! I need more strength from Him.

PRAYER is the key to life. The more you feel dry and tired, the more you got to pray. However when you are feeling dry and tired, placing yourself into prayer is really one of the biggest challenge also.

Taking the step out of comfort zone. God doesn't put us here on this earth to let us experience comfort and easyness. He place us here to do His purpose. Through all the wilderness, we are being tempted. Testings and mouldings in our character. In here, we are to make a difference in one's life and shine the glory of Christ. We need to grow stronger in God. We need to ask and draw the strength from Him. When we fall, there will still be strength to get up and carry on, not crushed.

Breaking the CEILING... in every areas...
spiritual life, family, cg, ministry, work, physical.. etc etc.
Tired... is what i still feel...

FAITH is the REASONED TRUST in God. Many times, devil whispers. Doubts, fears and insecurities begin to surface. I will just lose sight of the vision that He has placed before my eyes. Heart becomes burdened and mind wanders off. I just need to constantly remind myself to read, study and meditate on His words.

Feelings need to be gone and mind got to be focused. I couldn't let my mind and heart still revolves around it. Fixing my eyes upon Him and His works first. Someday, a better one will come.

:DDDDDDDD

{ 12:43:00 AM }

Tuesday, July 14, 2009.

SMILE!

Smile, though your heart is aching
Smile, even though it's breaking
When there are clouds in the sky
You'll get by...

If you smile
With your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just...

Light up your face with gladness
Hide every trace of sadness
Although a tear may be ever so near
That's the time you must keep on trying
Smile, what's the use of crying
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just...

Smile, though your heart is aching
Smile, even though it's breaking
When there are clouds in the sky
You'll get by...

If you smile
Through your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just smile...

That's the time you must keep on trying
Smile, what's the use of crying
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just smile

{ 10:51:00 AM }

Monday, July 13, 2009.

not 100%.
but im really trying to.

:)))))

{ 1:00:00 AM }

Thursday, July 09, 2009.

SMILE.

Smile even though your heart is aching.
Smile even though its breaking.
When there are clouds in the sky,
you'll get by if you smile through your fear and sorrow.
Smile and maybe tomorrow you'll see the sun come shining through for you.

:DDDDDDD

{ 12:04:00 AM }

Wednesday, July 08, 2009.

i wish i am in office right now...
so boreddddd now...
made wrong decision this morning...
:X

when we are weak, God makes us strong.
Be strong and of good courage.
keep on going.
PERSISTENCE.

Revelation to crystalization.
the need of fresh revelation everyday.

Compliance and Committed.
Right attitude and result.

:DDDD

{ 2:49:00 PM }

Friday, July 03, 2009.

smile!

After yesterday, it gives me a wake up slap too.

every tears,
every emotions,
every feelings,
every words,
every hope,
every struggles in heart.

The struggles of 3 girls.
It went complicated and out of way.
The emotions that we kept to ourselves.
The common reaction that we had.

Our decision.
It just don't worth it at all.
The more we push, the worser the situation will get.
We are going after something that doesn't goes to the same direction as us,
and in the end we'll just get lost somewhere.

Time to stop and walk at the right path.
Time to let go.
Time to smile.
Time to focus on better things.
Time to build our friendships instead.

smile.
love.
:DDDDD

Our constant fears, insecurities and frustrations may actually be unfounded and could tear at the fabric of our foundation in God. Instead of complaining and envying others, we can learn to accept who we are and celebrate our individuality without competing with people around us.

{ 3:36:00 PM }

what a day.........

the bruises.
the fall.
the awkwardness.
the lost feeling.
the tears.
the tears.
the silence left.
the tears.

felt so bad...
thanks to the few people who were there.

i don't know what to expect in the future?

but i really cherish all of you.
seriously, everyone.

love.
smile.
:)

{ 12:34:00 AM }

Thursday, July 02, 2009.

Proverbs 3:26
"For the Lord will be your confidence, and will keep your foot from being snared."

{ 10:30:00 AM }

I am happy that i can help in this week's choir for my zone decentralise service!

MJ zone + IC zone.
People in IC zone like joseph, han kiong and dequan. - our usual gang
Non-choir people volunteers to serve for this week like meiyin, jeffrey.
so cool right??

Let's us all take charge of the choir this week,
and make a difference in the atmosphere in the service!!!

:DDDDD


learning to be bolder....
learning to accept...
learning to engage...
learning to let things go naturally...
:)

{ 1:01:00 AM }

Wednesday, July 01, 2009.

be bold and not fearful.
step out and engage.

don't try to be someone whom you think that he will like.
just be yourself,
let the person likes you for who you are.

if eventually,
you're just not the one who he likes,
just move on.

:D

{ 1:35:00 PM }

frustrated.
holding back.
speechless.

tell me what to do please...

{ 2:03:00 AM }